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10 Tastes of Crosby You Must Try

on by in Lists, Rants and Raves, Uncategorized ⋅ 8 Comments

I wrote this article initially in 2015 but Crosby continues to change so much, especially with regard to the restaurant and bars around the town.  so here is the updated version, let me know if you agree!

Inspired by a recent article by Independent Liverpool on 36 things you must eat in Liverpool I turned my mind to my home town of Crosby and the increasingly diverse and excellent food and drink businesses that exist and continue to grow. So, after discussion with various friends and family and a twitter shout out for ideas, here are my far from definitive suggestions for things to try before you die in Crosby! I realise these will divide opinion and I am sure we grow it to 15, 20 or more delights of Crosby. If you agree / disagree / have any thoughts just put them in the comments at the end.

1. Pornstar Martini in This is Livin

This is a growing and thriving bar / restaurant off College Road which is particularly popular in the summer with its outdoor space and conservatory. Serving a range of quality beers, including draft Moretti ensures a decent, reasonably priced night out. However the stars of the show here are the cocktails and king of those is the Pornstar Martini. Well made, sweet and indulgent very easily Red’s (the wife) favourite.

 

2. Bavarian Slice from Satterthwaites

Bavarian-400x400

It was with a heavy heart that we saw the original Sattethwaites close but fortunately, like a phoenix from the flames, it has risen again. There are many things both sweet and savoury to relish at the new bakehouse but our particular favourite is the Bavarian Slice. Take care when eating as they can be messy things, my advice is keep licking the custard from the sides – only a fool goes straight for a full bite!

3. Afternoon Tea at Annie’s Tea RoomBZtEEIZIEAAwvuu.jpg-large-2

This is a real joy of a cafe and one I have done a review of in the past (click here). It is only a small tea room and often gets busy so phone ahead. It is no surprise it is so busy as the cakes and food are great, as is the service. Our favourite here, however, is the Afternoon Tea which is of the highest quality and a very reasonable price. I must also sneak a quick mention in for the lemon drizzle cake – delicious.

4. Seafood Platter from Ellingtons

Not open for most of the week but when it is you know you are getting quality. The best dish for me was their seafood platter a combination of crispy skinned fillets of hake, cod and trout, scallop, king prawns, crab and mussels. All of this cooked in light and delicious sauce with a good hint of chilli and served with beans, carrot and fragrant rice. You can read the full review of Ellington’s here

5. Duck Lettuce Cups from So Salsaseasons-52-korean-style-duck-lettuce-wraps

These are Red’s favourite when we go for a cheeky tapas at So Salsa. Sweet with a hint of spice these are a real treat, and the lettuce is one of your 5 a day!

6. Breakfast Barm Cake from Spoilt For ChoiceB8qijOxCIAAbCNG

Nothing starts the day off like a good breakfast, or for those in a hurry, breakfast in a bun and nobody makes these better than Mrs Spoily. Great service and quality from a stalwart of the Crosby community, this is really worth a visit.

7. A Pint of ice cold Estrella from Corkscrew Crosby

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After all that food and on a nice hot day what could be better than a quick visit to Corkscrew Crosby. Lois and her staff are extremely friendly and the Estrella is as close to a great Spanish experience that you can get in Crosby: crisp, chilled and in its own glass. Look out for the half pint glasses as well – cute!

8. Scampi from The Good Catch600full-scampi

A new addition to Crosby, this is one of a small chain of fish and chip shops which deliver quality fish and chips. Our favourite, however, is the scampi which provides something a little different from the traditional fish and chips. Make sure you have it with their delicious tartar sauce.

9. Post Workout Smoothie from Mojoe’s Juice Bar

Two berry smoothies

If like me you think workouts are a necessary (or maybe even an unnecessary) evil then to keep you going focus on your post workout smoothie and where better than the fantastic Mojoe’s. Again a very friendly staff and atmosphere and some of the best smoothies, juices and milkshakes in the area. The Post Workout Smoothie is a real treat of strawberries, raspberries and orange juice to pick you up off the floor following your over exertions.

10. Any Pizza from Blues Bar

An often overlooked venue right in the heart of Crosby Village, Blues Bar offers great food, drink and a family friendly atmosphere. However, by general consensus, the pizzas from Blues Bar are a winner, no matter which you choose. My favourite will always be JC’s Meat Feast but each to their own!

10 More Tastes of Crosby that you must try

on by in Lists ⋅ Leave a comment

Following the popularity of my previous post on 10 Tastes of Crosby You Must Try and the many comments suggesting some other tastes I had missed out, I have expanded the list to include a further 10 tastes to try in Crosby. Please note I have limited these just to Crosby. I am working on a separate Waterloo post to come soon. So following on from my previous 10 here we go:

11. A pint of Liverpool Pale Ale at The Liverpool Pigeon

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

This was a very obvious omission from my previous list and thanks to Paul for correcting me. The Pigeon was Liverpool’s first micro pub and has started a trend across the area for small scale pubs. It is not the place to go for cocktails and razzamatazz but for good quality ale in a welcoming juke-box free environment this is the place.

12. Iron Men Blend Coffee (IMC) from Crosby Coffeedf5afe2a0c4f0ca48222e1fce6b16478

It is great to see young local entrepreneurs doing well and Jack, the founder of Crosby coffee, is no exception. I did a longer review of several of the coffees from Crosby Coffee (click here) and they are great. All freshly roasted and the IMC is a blend of Brazilian Santos, Guatemalan Coschecha and Indian Cherry. Just opening the pouch is joy in itself as the rich, fresh aroma floods out.

13. Steak and Cheddar Pizza at Blues Barsample-image1

Blues Bar has undergone considerably change over the past couple of years and is now a great eatery in the heart of the village. Though they do a range of food they are best known for their excellent pizzas cooked in their own stone pizza oven. I know pizzas are a very personal preference for people but you cannot go far wrong with the steak and cheddar pizza.

14. Banoffee Ice Cream from Rizzi Caffe and GelateriaCLFQUbSWIAAv6y5

A very recent addition to the Crosby food scene this small independent eatery also opens late serving food into the evening. However, on a lovely hot day what could be better than wandering down to the beach or through one of our parks with a freshly made ice cream? Rizzis has exactly that and the pick of the bunch is their new banoffee ice cream. Go on treat yourself!

14. Spit Roasted Chicken from Gillions of Crosbyshop-2

For those of us who have lived in Crosby for a while the name of Gillions has always been synonymous with quality food (I think the shop existed before the boulder in Coronation Park!). They might be a few pence more expensive than the big supermarkets but they are a family business that provide quality and Brian and his team are always welcoming and helpful. On a Saturday they used to have a large spit roast oven outside the shop serving delicious spit roasted chickens now done indoors thanks to our lovely Sefton Council. Just make sure you are early enough as they ‘fly’ out of there.

15. Thai Street Tapas at AyuthayaIMG_9013

This is another restaurant I have done a full review of (click here) and the food is very good. The restaurant brings a welcome oriental dimension to the village and is a big improvement on Harry’s Bar. Of the many dishes worth a try I enjoyed the Street Tapas 2 from the lunch / early bird menu: pad thai chicken, mopping (sweet pork skewers), prawn toast and Tom Kha chicken soup.

16. A boneless chicken wing wrap with BBQ sauce from The Wingbox

Sorry couldn't find a wing box wrap!

Sorry couldn’t find a wingbox wrap!

Time for another takeaway and this time we go for the Wingbox which sits quietly on Cooks Road. Many people may not even have noticed it but they are actually local, with one other store in Liverpool. The buffalo style chicken wings are an obvious choice but drift a little further down the menu and you will find the treat that is the boneless chicken wrap. Enjoy with lashings of BBQ sauce. The diet can start tomorrow!

17. One of the Guest Beers at The Crow’s NestCrowsNest

Almost everyone over the age of 40 will have popped into the Crows at some point. A small pub but with a large character, whether wrapped up warm on a winter evening or sat outside on a summer day. The guest ales change regularly to reflect the seasons so choose your drink based upon any of the following: the weather, your company, the time of day, the month or even your emotional state!

18. Hot Chocolate at The Courtyard5A50_H

A little further out of Crosby (well yes it is Little Crosby but I would struggle to do a list of 10 things to taste in Little Crosby) is this charming little rural retreat. Like many of the entries above it has a wealth of wonderful offerings but our most enjoyable is the delicious hot chocolate with all the works.

19. Duck Breast with rice at The Lemon Treelemon_tree-compressor

A great little restaurant that has been around a while and always produces great food. Many good dishes to choose from but the duck with plums and jasmine rice is a winner on every level.

20. Jam Roly Poly with vanilla custard at AlbinaCK26orwWcAIq_cd.jpg-large

I know they had a listing in the first 10 tastes but this place really is that good and the jam role poly is to die for. None of your fluffy diet desserts this is made with full on suet and boy can you tell, not stodgy but full of luxurious joy. Have it with vanilla custard and you won’t regret it.

 

Liverpool Food and Drink Festival Preview

on by in Forthcoming events, Latest News

It is that time of year again when the children go back to school, the days get a bit shorter, BBC start a new Sunday night period drama and of course we have the Liverpool Food and Drink Festival. Now in its 7th Year I have watched the Sefton Park based jewel in SK Events crown grow considerably to the point where it is now a serious event in any true foodie’s calendar. This year it is slightly later in September but looks like another bumper year with the addition of a Friday evening with some excellent guests, exhibitors, activities, music and entertainment. Here is a brief taster of what to look out for with links for further information and tickets.

Tom Kerridge

Tom Kerridge

Friday 19th September – Pub in the Park

This looks a really intriguing addition to the original festival format with a celebration of the Great British Pub. This is intended to be a relaxed, chilled out event with a mixture of events ranging from SK Events own fine dining experience hosted by the cuddly Tom Kerridge and catered for by Liverpool’s latest fine dining chef Paul ‘Porky’ Askew (founder of the Arts School). Please note this is a pre-booked event (£96) click here for details.

For those with a slightly smaller budget there is still plenty to enjoy with a comedy pub quiz, Beer and Bangers tent, live music, pub games, dodgems and a host of other selected street food stalls. Please note that this is over 16s only.

What’s On – Saturday and Sunday

Across the whole weekend there are plenty of activities and events:

Celebrity Chef Arena (chefs usually on from around midday)

On Saturday is home to Michelin Starred TV chef Tom Kerridge with  his pub themed food which he will cook in demos and offer the opportunity for some Q and A.

Yotam Ottolenghi

Yotam Ottolenghi

On the Sunday there is a more mature feel in the Chef arena with Isreali born chef Yotam Ottolenghi. He is a personal favourite of mine and will showcase some of his exquisite dishes inspired by the Middle East and Asia.

Restaurant Arena

This plays host to the many great restaurants in the Liverpool and wider North West. Allowing us a chance to taste samples of their food with many freebies and also offers for visits to the restaurants.

Street Food Area

This is a personal favourite of mine and showcases much of the great street food that is available in the area. This is where you can experiment with some very exotic flavours and dishes that maybe you would not try in a restaurant. Always a winner!

Kids Zone

This is a great place to entertain the little ones with food based activities and creative challenges for all ages. You can even leave your buggies here to carry the little ones around ( a must if it rains!).

Market Place

Here the local small business (and some larger ones) give you the opportunity to buy produce and items to take home. Covering all sorts of things from cheeses and olives through to exotic meats and kitchen items. I find that i usually can spend ages looking around here. Make sure you bring your wallet!

Street Food

Street Food

What else?

Well lots to be honest. As always there will be live music throughout the day, usually with a folky twist. There are also bars with good quuality, local craft beers, wines, spirits and ciders. For the more sober visitor there is a cafe area and edible garden. Or for those with a sweet tooth there is a Heavenly Chocolate Area complete with its own chocolatiers.

This is a really great day (or evening) out for all the family (except Fri eve) and reasonably priced, particularly if you book ahead and avoid the queues! Useful links are below:

Main Site
Main Festival Tickets
List of Exhibitors

Street theatre part 1 – The Giant Spectacular

on by in Forthcoming events, Latest News, Uncategorized
Grandmother sleeping outside St George's Hall

Grandmother sleeping outside St George’s Hall

The first week of the summer holidays always seems to bring a burst of cultural action for me, Red and the boys and this year has been no different. The main event being the Giants: Memories of August 1914 (links and details at the end of the post). This is the street theatre creation of Royal de Luxe writer and directer, Jean-Luc Courcoult. Having previously brought us the Titanic inspired story Sea Odyssey, this time Courcoult, not a man to miss a trick such as the 100th anniversary of the start of WW1, has created a much more ethereal story in which the Grandmother crosses through space and time before passing away. As part of that journey she tells stories, in this case about the King’s Regiment in 1914 and one of the Pal’s Battalions that made up the regiment.

Bit of history – Pals’s Battalions were the War Office’s answer to troop shortages in the First World War. Recruitment focused upon local villages and events such as football matches to gather volunteers from local areas with the assurance that they would fight together as a group in the trenches. Sadly, not only did they get to fight together but they also got to die together, leaving large swathes of some communities without their young men – end of history lesson.

The Grandmother - complete with acrobatic manipulators

The Grandmother – complete with acrobatic manipulators

So this is the basic premise that Courcoult’s work is based upon – the Grandmother ambling around Liverpool sharing elements of the story whilst her grandaughter is also wandering around with her pet dog. Let us be honest, however, as it isn’t the story we have all come to experience, it is the Giants. These beautifully carved and constructed leviathans are incredibly impressive: the young girl, who we have seen before, has a haunting reality to her actions and movement. Whilst the Grandmother is a joy to watch in full flow (no not in the Wayne Rooney sense) but the sheer mechanics of her movement, as part of a choreographed ‘performance’ with the bouncing acrobats energetically pulling various ropes and levers to make it all happen (in some ways very similar to me getting out of bed after playing football the day before).

Up close the whole thing resembles something Fred Dibnah might have cobbled together with some meccano, balsa wood and a bit of araldite, constantly on the brink of implosion. The diesel engine chugging and breathless gasps of the troubadours are drowned out by the loud music coming from the trailing 4 piece band on a less romantic flatbed. But, it is as you move away, the giants become things of beauty, brought to life magically by the operators. The clever detail of their construction and movement give them a living presence which, when set against the backdrop of the many imposing and magnificent buildings in the city, they look alive. Indeed it is that combination of setting and marionettes that makes the whole thing work so well. Performed on an industrial estate in Slough and it might lose its magic but amidst the architectural beauty of Liverpool it fits perfectly.

So regardless of the slightly surreal story, the huge crowds gathering this weekend are in for a treat. Indeed it is the spectacle rather than the story that makes them the success they are. It doesn’t matter if you cannot hear the words spoken or if you do not understand the music and songs being played, as they are secondary to the living and walking spectacle. In this very modern world we live in it is quite heartwarming to think that over a million people are turning out to watch a ‘puppet show’! Since 2000 BC humans have been intrigued by marionettes and the stories their ‘manipulators’ tell through them and it is this interest and simple joy that is still alive and well on the streets of Liverpool this weekend. And long may such simple pleasures continue!

Giants website: here

Sunday Route Details:Here but remember it starts today (Sunday) at The Strand instead of Clarence Dock about 10am.

Whiskey Galore – lessons in whiskey

on by in Rants and Raves, Uncategorized

It was at a recent and very pleasant visit to the newly opened Albion Crosby that my love affair with whiskey was reignited, courtesy of a very excellent Blood and Sand cocktail. This is one of the older whiskey based cocktails with a tale all of its own: being created in 1922 for Rudolph Valentino’s bullfighter movie of the same name. Several of these very potent cocktails later, as Red guided me home, I realised whiskey was the mistress I loved to hate. So I felt moved to pen some thoughts on this most adult of spirits.

Defintion: Whisky or whiskey is a type of distilled alcoholic beverage made from fermented grain mash. 

655425Simple definition, simple drink, or at least you might think so. But the reality is far from simple. In truth, whiskey is the Louis Suarez of drinks: some people love it, some hate it and it packs a vicious bite! Like many of you, I have had varied experiences of whiskey ranging from that napalm-like first gulp of a stray glass in a family party, to the meaningful and emotional late night sip with a friend whilst putting the world to rights, and everything in between.

"Whiskey is liquid sunshine" - George Bernard Shaw

“Whiskey is liquid sunshine” – George Bernard Shaw

George Bernard Shaw described whiskey as “liquid sunshine” and, by all accounts, he was experienced enough with the topic to pass such a judgement. Indeed the word whiskey comes from the Gaelic for water of life. There is no surprise that in Compton McKenzie’s famous novel, Whisky Galore, it is not the rationing of food that is the problem for those on the Hebridean islands of Great and Little Todday but the lack of whiskey.

Let’s face it, whiskey can give wine a run for its money and then some when it comes down to varieties, blends, styles and of course, experts.

Types of Whiskey

For the beginner, however, here is a brief summary of they main types of whiskey. Let us start with the building blocks:

Malt whiskey – primarily made from malted barley

Grain whiskey – primarily made from any type of grain

Now comes the various ways of combining these ingredients:

Single malt – this is whiskey made from only one type of malted grain but may contain whiskey of different ages or from different casks. For example Glenfiddich or Penderyn

Blended malt – a mixture of single malt whiskeys from different distilleries. For example Famous Grouse or J & B

Blended whiskey – this is a mix of various whiskeys from different distilleries. For example Johnnie Walker or Teachers

Whiskey Around the World

But this is just the start as we look around the world, each different culture, seems to have taken the basic concept of whiskey and intertwined it with their own, unique, characteristics. In the American south the world famous home of bourbons such as Jack Daniels or Jim Beam.  Meanwhile Canada also enjoys a strong reputation for its own whiskey production. Probably less well known is the fact that Finland, Sweden, Spain, Japan and even India have thriving whiskey production.

For most of us, however, the choice is about whether to have Scotch or Irish? In fact the word Scotch has become synonymous with any whiskey but my preference has always been for the milder and richer Irish, such as Jameson’s but maybe that is down to my heritage which, like Westlife, shamrock, men in vests, an obsession with horses, the Commitments, the IRA and Louis Walsh, is of the emerald persuasion.

 Some bearded Son of Glyndwyr will have been producing something resembling whiskey in a hut on a hill since before the first scouser and family pitched up in Prestatyn

290_peated1However, I have recently been made aware that the Welsh have branched out into whiskey production as well with the excellent Penderhyn distillery, which opened in 2000 producing the award winning Madeira single malt. Yes I know some bearded Son of Glyndwyr will have been producing something resembling whiskey in a hut on a hill since before the first scouser and family pitched up in Prestatyn, but this is the first big time production, and it is good!

The truth about whiskey, wherever it is from, is that it is a grown up drink. Yes we have all seen the Chav glugging a JD drowned in coke, or youthful exuberance enjoying a Southern Comfort, lime and lemonade but, for every one of them, there is a truly mature whiskey drinker, hardened through life’s experiences and scarred by the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, who sips and savours. Like the leather clad Aragorn from the Lord of the Rings movies, Jax Teller from the Son’s of Anarchy, Francis Underwood from House of Cards (OK so you can tell I have Netflix!) or even a slightly giddy Honest Ade nursing his 4th Blood and Sand. To paraphrase the author of Whisky Galore, Compton McKenzie, when asked if Love made the world go round, he blinked and replied “Maybe so, but whisky makes it go round twice as fast!”

Wirral Farm Feast

on by in Forthcoming events ⋅ Leave a comment

Wirral Food and Drink was always a regular in the calendar of most foodies in the North West. Last year the organisers took a sabbatical but have returned bigger and stronger this year with Farm Feast. This two day festival of food, drink and music based in Claremont Farm in Bebington, the event, running over the tail end of the bank holiday (Sun 25th and Mon 26th May), is an enterprising expansion of what was already so good about Wirral Food and Drink – the food and drink, but with the addition of a new music event – Livestock.

For me there are certain things any decent food show needs to have: food stalls, drink, something for the children, a few famous names and of course music. So how does Farm Feast fare against these criteria?

StallsArtisan_stalls-960x435

Farm Feast promises a vibrant and extensive range of artisan stalls offering everything from the traditional bread and cheeses through to meats, pickles, pies as well as more obscure arts, crafts and culinary equipment. The sheer number of stalls and exhibitors is very impressive, putting many other food shows into the shade. From previous experience I can guarantee that there is certainly something for everyone, just remember your wallet!

Drink

The old Wirral Food and drink always had plenty of decent pop-up bars offering a range of quality craft and small brewery ales and ciders. this year that seems to have expanded even further by teaming up with the legendary Ship and Mitre to ensure that there is something for everyone ranging from fresh and fruity beers to the more industrial offerings of the Mad Hatter Brewing. But this year it is not all about beer and cider. Cocktails, wine and whiskey (sounds like a normal Saturday night!) are on offer with the Polynesian paradise of the Aloha Tiki Bar and the more hardcore Berry and Rye whiskey den.

Something for the Children

For the children as well there will be plenty to do in the Little Feasters Zone. Here they will be able to have a go at cooking themselves, watch displays on cooking, story telling, bushcraft and even a treasure hunt. This is a working farm and they have always used this to good effect with many animals involved in an attempt to educate children, and adults, about farming and the issues facing farmers today. I am particularly looking forward to seeing the Mike Prichard’s working horses displays.

Great British Bake Off Star Brendan Lynch

Great British Bake Off Star Brendan Lynch

A Few Famous Names

In addition to the stalls there are also chef demonstrations and talks from the likes of Liverpool Yacht Club owner and chef Adam Franklin, the scientifically driven mad professor-cum-chef  and gastronaught Stefan Gates and my wife, Red’s, personal favourite Great British Bake Off star Brendan Lynch.

Music

And finally music. Well during the daytime Farm Feast there will be an eclectic mix of offerings across the Main Stage and the Courtyard Stage. With reputable artists such as the rock and roll of Rob Vincent and LMA Female Artist of the Year Natalie McCool on the Sunday and the indie based Ragamuffins and cello led rock and roll of the Mono LPs on the Monday.

Livestock

Livestock-poster

Wait! That is not all. This year sees the addition of its own music festival in the form of the wittily entitled Livestock. This promises to be a really enjoyable evening of musical entertainment, particularly with the scoop of having Peter Hook and his band as the headliner act. He promises to deliver an excellent set including some greats from his New Order / Joy Division days.

Beyond the headliner though the undercard is also pretty decent with up and coming star Dan Croll singing from his acclaimed debut album Sweet Disarray, the all-female artiness of Stealing Sheep and in preparation for the LIMF, Liverpool based Soho Riots.

So all in all this whole event has something for everyone. So get your tickets, bring your wallet and don’t forget your wellies!

 

 

Annie’s Tea Rooms, Crosby

on by in Cafes ⋅ Leave a comment

What are a few days off work for? Long walks, relaxation, reading, writing reviews? No, when living with Red they usually consist of decorating, ironing and endless lists of jobs! Well that is exactly how today has gone with a newly painted front to the house to show for our joint efforts. On the verge of exhaustion and starvation (she claims), Red left me to finish the painting whilst she took a necessary restorative jaunt with her friend, Lady Furness, to the popular Annie’s Tea Rooms in Crosby. Hence this review is being done vicariously as she relays her views whilst she recovers from her post-lunch indulgence. Take a letter Mrs Jones…

A clean and well laid out tea room buzzing with couples, friends and ladies doing lunch. Red and LF were quickly seated by courteous staff and each of the specials pointed out and the cakes explained (who knew cakes needed to be explained). Red plumped for a decaf tea and strawberry cheesecake whilst LF treated herself to her usual luxury hot chocolate and an afternoon scone.

Service was polite and efficient with drinks and cakes arriving within minutes. The strawberry cheesecake had a moreish crumbly base and a flavour packed cheese filling (I still find the cheese/dessert thing weird) and crowned with fresh strawberries. Meanwhile, LF’s scone was “succulent with fresh cream and jam” and her hot chocolate was “pure decadence”. By that I think she means dripping in fresh cream and marshmallows. To be fair this is praise indeed as few people on the planet could boast LF’s knowledge and experience in the field of chocolate beverages, an aspect of life to which she has dedicated many hours studying.

With the buzz of chocolate and sugar racing through the pair of them their humour was further improved by the bill, with the whole thing costing less than £10. And so the pair phoned the ‘other half’ taxi company and headed home, with Red content that after a morning of hard DIY she had earned her afternoon treat. Upon her return she informed me that she is looking forward to her next visit to try the blueberry and lemon cake. Oh and pointed out I had missed a bit!

Type: cafe

  • Service: 9/10 polite, efficient and knowledgeable
  • Atmosphere: 8/10 friendly and buzzing, never an empty table
  • Food: 10/10 excellent food
  • Value for money: 9/10 all that and change from £10
  • Overall: 9 Great service, pleasant environment and delicious treats.

These are judged against the best of that type of restaurant. For example cafes against what you would expect from the best cafes, high end restaurants against the best high end restaurants etc.

Website: Annie’s Tea Rooms

 

Annie's Tea Rooms on Urbanspoon

Weird Eaters – Is that you?

on by in Rants and Raves ⋅ 1 Comment
Jack the Ripper

Jack the Ripper

“Get it away! Get it away! What is wrong with you?” Now at this point we could play a guessing game as to why my wife, Red, was barking these instructions at me. You could easily be forgiven for thinking I was carrying out some debauched act on a par with Alan Partidge’s mix up over the chocolate mouse. I can even feel you thinking of stopping reading now and reporting me to a variety of law enforcement agencies and on such evidence, who could blame you?

“The bean juice is touching my egg!”

So what hideous crime against humanity had I committed in order to be the target of such vehement rebuke? Well I will let Red’s next sentence explain all. “The bean juice is touching my egg!” Now I know for those of you with a slightly impure mind you may still be considering whether this is some sort of exotic euphemism, but let me assure you it is not.

My sole crime was to serve her dinner in such a way that two of the ingredients, namely the juice from the baked beans and the fried egg, had come into contact. Is this really such an act of barbarous inhumanity, placing me in the ranks of Attila the Hun, Jack the Ripper, Charles Manson and Jim Davidson?

Well, after some research, the answer would appear to be yes. it turns out that there are legions of you who have your own food peculiarities, it is just that we all see our own as normal. It turns out that food ‘weirdness’ is as common amongst your average Joe as a penchant for black bin bags and oranges with Tory ministers. Here are just a few of the most common ones I unearthed:

  • the aforesaid bean juice touching any other item on the plate.
  • Not being able to eat the ends of sausages (no sniggering at the back please!).
  • Only ever eating one food item at a time off your plate ie not mixing things up in your mouth.
  • Not liking white food (apparently only being able to eat foods of a certain darkness).
  • Only eat food out of bowls not plates.
  • Needing to eat small things in multiples of even numbers eg chips.
  • Eating the outer layer of things before eating the middle eg twix or maltesers.
  • Only able to eat square ended chips.
Let the bean see the juice

Let the bean see the juice

These are just some of the ones people have happily shared with me, and why are they so happy to share with me? The answer is simple, everyone I have spoken to thinks their food ‘thing’ is normal. This led my research even deeper. Were there even odder examples of food behaviour? The more I researched this topic the more unnerved I became, as some of the obsessions were truly bizarre. So, missing out the sick and illegal ones, here then is a list of the top 3 weird and wonderful food fetishes that are out there.

  1. Xylophagia – involving the consumption of wood (right that is the last time, one more snigger and you are out!). People suffering from this usually eat things like paper, pencils or tree bark.
  2. Hyalophogia – the desire to eat glass. This, I do not need to point out, is extremely dangerous and so DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME!
  3. Trichophagia – the compulsive eating of hair.Most often it is women with long hair who eat it directly from their own heads. It can often induce a hairball. In 2007 one teen girl needed a 4.5kg hairball removing from her stomach.
Would Sir like any bread with his pubic pate?

Would Sir like any bread with his pubic pate?

“Whose is it? What colour is it? Is it one of mine? Is it from a head or some other part of the anatomy?”

Now I am sure we have all had that horrific moment when we discover a hair in our food. Hopefully on the plate rather than being pulled from our mouths a la Paul Daniels and his flags on a string. It is sickening! As are the questions racing through our minds: whose is it? What colour is it? Is it one of mine? Is it from a head or some other part of the anatomy? I am sure you can feel yourself starting to baulk already. So, even though it was self-inflicted, pity that poor girl having the equivalent of a small family pet being removed from her stomach.

Where do you stand on sausage 'knots'?

Where do you stand on sausage ‘knots’?

So what have I learnt through this spate of culinary fetish research? Well firstly, there are plenty of extreme food fetishes out there. Secondly, that we all seem to have our own peculiarities. Thirdly, we think our own food peculiarities are normal and everyone else is weird! The clearest example of this is my wife, Red, who cannot eat the ends of sausages (sausage knots as she calls them) whilst her brother, Alby, would see a plate of sausage knots as a gourmet delight on a par with the finest caviar! The only conclusion I can reach, apart from being tied by marriage to a family of the insane, is that the old saying is true: one man’s meat truly is another man’s poison.

If you have been affected by any of the issues above please call ….. No seriously if you have your own weird food ‘thing’ let us know in the comments section below – no need to leave an email address, just a name.

 

Crosby Festival of the Sea – what and when?

on by in Latest News ⋅ 7 Comments

In response to a number of questions following my preview of the First Festival of the Sea here is a list of the running orders over the next two days and the rough times they will take place:

Saturday (all times are very approximate!)

12 noon: Shanty Kings

1pm: Mersey Riggers

1.45: Bellisimo Disney Choir

2.15pm: Shanty Kings

2.50pm: Lorna Proctor Dance

3pm: Mersey Riggers

4pm: Notre Dame College Band

4.30pm: St Nicholas School Choir

Sunday

12 noon: Lorna Proctor Dance / Sophie Bell

12.30pm: Paris Graham Jones

1pm: Adam McLoughlin

4pm: Shanty Kings

L’Enclume: The King is in His Altogether

on by in Latest News, Rants and Raves ⋅ 1 Comment

Last year I decided to treat Red and book her in to L’Enclume, chef Simon Rogan’s acclaimed restaurant in the picturesque village of Cartmel, in the Lakes. Too generous I hear you say! Well to top that, we also stayed at his hotel in the village too. Who said I was tight?

Simon Rogan outside his restaurant L'Enclume

Simon Rogan outside his restaurant L’Enclume

There is no doubting the skill and genius of Rogan both as a chef and a businessman. To have the guts to invest so much in such a remote outpost was brave to say the least, but a decision that has clearly paid off, with the restaurant usurping The Fat Duck as the best restaurant in the UK. It is at this point that I should say how much we enjoyed everything and all would be right with the food world. But here is the problem, we didn’t and it isn’t.

The Problem

Now this is not a review of L’Enclume, the visit was too distant to do justice to each of the many courses of the taster menu. Instead, it is my criticism of what appears to be a growing, and accepted, trend across many restaurants, and with many chefs: gastronomic masturbation. Mind your language Timothy!

No this is nothing to do with the many apocryphal stories of what disgruntled cooks might add to your curry, but rather the obsession with many chefs to show you how clever they are. But isn’t that the point you may well say. Well to a degree yes. We want to see how skilled the chef is, we want to see how his training and experience can turn raw materials into a thing of tasteful wonder. What we are getting however is them showing us different roles: those of artists or scientists.

Chef, Artist or Scientist?

Sadly many chefs, including Rogan, have taken this a step too far: they over manipulate and over think their food, they place the ‘concept’ above the importance of taste and enjoyment. It ceases to be the diners who are the important people, it isn’t even the food, it is now the chef and his concepts. Plenty of time and money is spent sourcing fantastic ingredients and produce only to be dashed upon the rocks of the chef’s egotistical desire to parade how clever they are as a cross between Van Gogh and Marie Curie. This was the case at L’Enclume where, of the 200 course tasting menu (yes I am exaggerating here), only a couple were enjoyable: by that I mean something tasty, rewarding and worth the effort. All too often the food was lost within the science and concept, with Rogan losing the essence of the dining experience in favour of being ‘clever’ with the food and showing he was in control.

“Food is too often over-thought and over-wrought”

Michael Caines has the balance right

Michael Caines has the balance right

Control

Control is a key element to this, particularly with the growth of taster menus: the chef wanting to tell you what you are going to eat. Now, can I make clear that I am not against taster menus per se, in fact one of the best meals I have ever experienced was the taster menu at Michael Caines’ ABode (sic) in Manchester. The problem occurs when the chef combines the taster menu with heavily over-thought and over-wrought food that has become too far removed from its original self.

“You are not here to enjoy yourselves!”

In addition, this control often extends into the suffocation within the dining room itself. On a pre-meal amble around Cartmel one of the local shop owners, upon discovering we were dining at L’Enclume, described it as the Headmaster’s study. The meaning of his comment became very clear upon our arrival at the dining room: this was clearly a serious place that looked down its nose at you as if to say “you are not here to enjoy yourself!” The somber, earnest atmosphere was maintained by the ultra-serious staff who approached their roles with the strict professionalism and singularity of purpose similar to that of the alter boy that still serves at mass even though he is nearly 20. Fun was not an option: any joviality at our table was quickly smothered by frowns of disapproval. Our fellow diners around the room, sat and ate in hushed reverence in the best Benedictine tradition, like cult members in a trance. It was all I could do to avoid shouting “I am a name not a number” with my best Patrick McGoohan impression.

Do what you do best

Within this stifling atmosphere, which is becoming common beyond the reaches of L’Enclume, the message appears clear: you are lucky to even have a seat in my restaurant, sit back and do as you are told. Now I am all for being educated along my gastronomic journey, and happy to try the creative and the new. I will even fork out sizeable quantities of my hard earned money to do so or travel large distances to have the experience. However, when all is said and done, I want to enjoy myself, to taste quality food, prepared well and delivered in a way that I will enjoy. So Mr Rogan et al please remember you are chefs and excel in that role as you have trained to do, leave the other side to the scientists or artists. In turn I promise I shall never track down Banksy to knock me up an omelette or pester Brian Cox to let me try his creme Anglaise!

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